Ketchup

All right.

Storm door installed? Check.
Recital completed? Check.
Tasty after-recital Meal? Check.
Company Departed Happy? Check.
Company Jokes About Me Doing Laundry? Check.
Updating to stop the Public Clamor? In-Progress.

I stopped in the bathroom on my way into the computer lab. In addition to the normal washroom sounds, like water running and paper towels tearing, I heard mumbling. After I wondered for a bit, it turns out that someone in one of the stalls was on his cell phone. At least, I hope he was.

Let's give him the benefit of the doubt, and assume that he received an incredibly important call. The high-powered lawfirm of Druskin, Apornekey, Jumalish, Dytrot, and Finkleheimerglastonduwirry was calling to let him know he'd been made partner. His mother on the line, letting him know that it turns out the tests were all negative, except for the one that wasn't. His agent, letting him know that the part he wanted went to Kevin Spacey instead. Something. Anything. Because during the day, I don't know what's so important that you can't wait until you have...ahem....washed your hands and returned to the common area.

*** *** ***

"I'm not a hockey player, but I do hit people."

Turns out I've got a lot of force. At least, force as defined as "mass x velocity". I was walking along the sidewalk today and three people were coming towards me, walking abreast. This formation took up the entire width of the sidewalk. Both groups noticed each other, and I assumed that was enough to prevent collision. Alas, no.

As we got closer and closer, I realized that the fellow on the end was walking straight down the path I was (i.e., the right edge of the sidewalk). I moved as far as possible to the side, without stepping into the grass. Then, for whatever reason, I just squared my shoulders and kept moving. He saw that we were headed straight for each other, but he didn't show any desire to give way and step slightly behind the two women he was walking with. Confident in my own right of way, we crashed into each other.

Well, "crash" is what would have happened if we were cars. It's a word that implies damage to both sides. Our "intersection" was more one-sided. I struck him like a large slab of beef (which I am). He ended up on the ground. I felt bad, but a fleeting bad. After all, if he'd only given way slightly, it never would have happened.

Of course, I could have ALSO, but I figure once out of every thousand times, it's time to check somebody. Plus, he was askin' fer it. My body in motion tends to stay in motion, I guess.

Physics is fun.