Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Schism on, you crazy diamond!

This just in... Pope Benedict XVI releases statement. Tells Protestants they're not good Catholics. Protestants say, "Perhaps you met our friend Martin Luther?"

I've got to hand it to the Pope. He's the butt of a lot of jokes. He wears funny hats, talks a lot, and is a social conservative. In fact, he may be THE social conservative. That's a tough act to sell, especially to a billion Catholics.

And while I'm positive he's NOT Jewish, he does have a lot of chutzpah. He recently issued a statement (SOURCE) which tells all the sects who are AWOL from the Catholic church that they are not true churches of Jesus. This document basically says that Catholics and Protestants have different ideas about the doctrine of the church. Holy faith crisis! Did I step back into 1517? Do you smell that? Quick, everyone check their shoes for Theses!

Who is this document for? Catholics? They already believe the Pope is the Vicar of Christ, the primary intercessor. Is it for Protestants? I don't think they're going to take the Pope's word on how Jesus thinks. For Eastern Orthodox? I doubt they're going to be receptive, either.

Is this a "pat yourself on the back if you're Catholic" statement? I have no idea, but it's really a fantastic "nose tweak" to other Christian faiths.

"Guess what, apostates? I say you're wrong about Jesus. And my religion says I'm infallible. Ergo... you suck!"

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