A Big Tall Glass of 'Calm Down' Juice

I was eating in a restraunt today, one of those ones with a drive-thru lane that wraps around the building. A low-riding pickup (painted some strange color that I bet an interior decorator would call an "dusky earth tone") came around after ordering to wait in line behind the car at the window. After taking a bite of my food, a mom-style minivan had pulled around behind the pickup. The woman who was driving (probably early 40's) was gesticulating wildly and saying words that required her mouth to get really big. It was a bit like watching a sporting coach verbally assault an official; almost like their mouths are moving in slow motion, like you might be able to read their lips if you tried.

She was gesturing at the pick-up in front of her, and engaging in some sort of accusation. She seemed extremely frustrated. I'm not quite sure what the story was. Generally, if you make people mad on the road, they don't follow you into the drive-thru lane to keep talking at you, so that's off the list. The windows were rolled up on both cars, so nobody could actually hear anyone else. The truck only had one bumper sticker I could see, which was for something like "Young Protestants for George W. Bush". Quite frankly, I'm not sure this would create that much of a scene. At least, not this far away from the major universities in town.

Not content with pointing out his faults to a non-existant passenger, she then picked up her cell, used a one-touch dial, and spoke to someone on the phone about it. A friend? Who knows. I think she was even leaving a message, because from the time she picked up her phone to when she closed it, her mouth never stopped moving. It would have been difficult for the person on the other end to get a word in; words like "hello," for example.

I'm not sure what this fellow had done to this lady in a past life; perhaps a shark the color of his car killed her parents. I couldn't say. But people like this really need to learn how to let some things go, especially when driving a two-ton vehicle.