Saturday, May 15, 2010

May 8th, Part the WHOOPS: Doctor Andy and Christopher Lee, sitting in a tree

When we last left me on May 8th, it was still close to noon and my friend was picking nits through my love life.  I don't mind, really -- it's not often anyone bothers to ask about my love life.  It must come from being tall and scary.  After all, do you think anyone asks Christopher Lee about his love life?  And if they did, would you expect him to answer in any way other than:

"I SHED THE BLOOD OF FOUR THOUSAND SAXON MEN"


Lest you think that is not the type of thing Christopher Lee would say, I would direct you to his latest sword-swinging venture, "Charlemagne: By the Sword and the Cross", a heavy metal / musical album with Christopher Lee as the eponymous Saxon-slayer.  He doesn't just say the above line, he almost sings it.  Well, it's more sprechstimme, but we don't want that fancy musical knowledge here!



The band formed for the album appears to be a bunch of nerds who got tired of not being thought of as "cool", so they turned into a "nerd-metal" band.  That may be comical, but it's the only way I can describe seeing a guy with long hair swing a sword (slow-motion) in front of a green-screen castle, then flip it around and mime guitar thrashing on it.  While headbanging.  It's... yeah.

I don't think it reflects poorly on Christopher Lee, though.  He's had a movie career going back to the 40's, making over 200 films.  "Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon" wouldn't be nearly as fun or difficult with Christopher Lee, because absolutely no one in Hollywood is "six degrees" from him.  Most people are barely two.  In fact, *I* am probably only four degrees from him, and I've only appeared in school plays on film.

And Christopher Lee has never been shy about admitting he's been in bad movies.  But he treats all movies the same: they are opportunities for supporting his family.  So I don't blame him at all for putting on a crown and swinging a sword in a studio.  He's 88 and practically a superhero.  I mean, he learned how to speak German by listening to Wagner!

But enough about him: this entry is about a wedding!

At least it was, but then I got started talking about Christopher Lee and... well... I decided to excise it from the original entry.  It does a disservice to the wedding to combine it with too much unrelated heavy-metal music. A little is OK, but one doesn't want to go overboard.  See you in the entry after this!

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